When I was younger I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind.
He broke his own heart and I watched
As he tried to reassemble it.
And my momma swore
That she would never let herself forget.
And that was the day that I promised
I’d never sing of love if it does not exist.
You are the only exception..
Maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul
That love never lasts.
And we’ve got to find other ways to make it alone.
Or keep a straight face.
And I’ve always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable distance.
And up until now I have sworn to myself
That I’m content with loneliness.
Because none of it was ever worth the risk.
And tonight, I’m begging for you to remember me.
I beg you to remember me as much as I remember you while staring in the cold darkness in my room.
I beg you to remember me as much as I remember you when I walk home alone desperately trying to remember what your hand felt like.
I beg you to remember me as much as I remember you when I try to find you in every empty stare I get from other men.
I beg you to remember me as much as I remember you when I think my best friend’s body at night is you, trying to sleep on her like I slept on you.
I beg you
To remember me,
as much as I remember you.
Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood
We knew each other in a way we no longer were and never would be again. Being a stranger is hard, but being a stranger when you’re so impossibly close is unbearable.
When did loving yourself
become so rare, that it’s
revolutionary to do so?
I knew that I had never deceived him. He always knew what I was up to but he chose every time to have me carry the burden of the lie or the choice. It wasn’t fair. When you care deeply about a daughter, you protect her from herself. You give advice, you offer direction, you confront a lie, at the risk of being rejected. You give yourself openly, without reservation. My father did care.
She did not wish to change the life that imprisoned her.
I want to write and I want to paint and I want to draw
to show on paper how you’ve created this sorrow in my heart
I want to scream and I want to cry and I want to ache
to remember how painful that plane ride felt
I want to dance and drink and get high
to forget how much fire has burnt down my home inside.